


Monochrome

by rappersandwich



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-26
Updated: 2016-03-26
Packaged: 2018-05-29 05:31:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,203
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6361405
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rappersandwich/pseuds/rappersandwich
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p></p><div class="center">
  <p> In this world, when you’re born, all you see is black and white.<br/>You only see all the colors when you meet your soulmate. </p>
</div>
            </blockquote>





	Monochrome

“Jongin.”

 

“…”

 

“Jongiiiin.”

 

“…”

 

“Jong- _iiiiiiin._ ”

 

“…mmm _whaaat._ ”

 

“Get up.”

 

“Mmmwhy…”

 

“Because it’s Saturday.”

 

“Sooo…”

 

“You have work today!”

 

“But I don’t wanna go!” He dives his face into Kyungsoo’s pillow.

 

“Come on, you have plenty of time to sleep tomorrow. Or later. You can sleep later tonight. You know you can’t let the kids down.”

 

Jongin sighs in defeat. “Yeah, okay, fiiine.” He sits up while rubbing his eyes and stretches. He takes one good look at Kyungsoo, smiles, and in one sudden movement, has his boyfriend pinned on the bed. As Kungsoo struggles to get away, Jongin chuckles, making Kyungsoo laugh as well. They stay in that position for who knows how long until Kyungsoo mentions the time. Jongin’s eyes widen and quickly jumps off the bed, scrambling to the shower, nearly toppling over the bedroom’s couch. Kyungsoo sits up as well, laughing quietly into his hand because Jongin could be so clumsy and careless at times. 

 

Not that he was complaining, though; Kyungsoo loves how the clumsy dance instructor wormed his way into his life and decided to stay in his heart permanently, adding color to the once monochromatic canvas of his mind, heart, and soul.

 

 

 

Jongin started out as a dance instructor when he was just in his junior year of highschool; at 16, he started teaching kids part-time how to dance at the studio down the block from his dorm. He wanted to attend an arts college so he needed to work hard for the money. Dancing was his life, he absolutely loved kids, plus, the ahjumma who owned the place adored him. So he thought, why not?

 

His teaching skills were a bit rough around the edges at first, but they were enough to put on a great show for the recital of the first batch of kids and also enough for him to land a permanent job at the place. Jongin soon started teaching kids regularly, every Saturday afternoon, improving his teaching skills, flexibility, and patience with kids. Being a legitimate dance instructor, he was able to go to the studio any time he wanted and use the place to practice or unwind. Not only was he earning enough to be able to put himself through college without asking help from his parents, but he was also able to improve his dancing a lot more to the point that he was confident about passing the audition for admission. He still had a year to perfect his skills, though, so he had plenty of time to practice and re-choreograph his routine.

 

As Jongin started his last year of high school, he met Oh Sehun. The five-year old showed a lot of potential as they started their lessons. Jongin could see the desire to be great in the kid’s eyes, so he paid close attention to the boy. As a 17-year old wanting to live out his dream without the utmost approval of his parents, Jongin understood. The road to greatness was still one he was travelling, and it was always bumpy. At least Sehun’s parents knew and understood their son’s passion. All the more, Jongin wanted to help the kid reach his goal even just a little bit. And when Sehun collapsed in exhaustion after their class for the first time, he knew he had to step up his game because Sehun sure was stepping up his.

 

All the blood and tears Jongin shed were worth it and all his hard work paid off when he got accepted into his dream school without the panel of judges even batting an eyelash after his audition. That standing ovation he got from them and the _“You’re in!”_ from the school’s director was a huge deal for him because stars were made there, and he wanted to become one of the brightest. But during his first year of college, he had to let go of something precious to him, causing him to rethink some of his life decisions: Sehun and his family were migrating to China.

 

A month earlier, while Sehun was getting his things ready to go home, Jongin talked to Minseok, the guy who always picked Sehun up at the studio. Minseok mentioned he was sad because the kid and his family were moving but he never mentioned where they were moving to.

 

Even though he didn’t bond with Sehun as much as he wanted to, Jongin still thought of the kid as something special, and he hoped that, somehow, he made an impact in Sehun’s life. Jongin didn’t want to know that he was the greatest dance teacher of all time; he wanted to know if Sehun knew that dancing wasn’t just a bunch of moves put together to the rhythm of a bunch of songs, but it was a freedom of expression. To be able to let out his emotions, especially his happiness and frustrations, through dancing was such a relief for Jongin. So, he wanted to know if he had instilled in Sehun that dancing was something you could run to at any time in your life and that once you have a passion for it, the flame never dies.

 

That’s how a six-year old boy, by the name of Oh Sehun, helped Kim Jongin realize his true dream – to be the spark that ignites the flame in each person he encounters. Since then, all of Jongin’s hard work in learning all kinds of dances were for helping others find that talent they never knew they had.

 

Jongin realized, with the help of Sehun, that he _really_ wanted to become a professional dance instructor.

 

 

“Wow, so that kid made a really huge difference, huh?”

 

“Yeah, he did. He’s one of the people I have to thank for helping me become who I am today.”

 

“You did turn out pretty great.” Kyungsoo smiles. “So why don’t you? Haven’t heard from him since then?”

 

Jongin sighs. “Nope,” he says, making sure to say it with a popping sound at the end. “Guess I really didn’t become the greatest dance teacher of all time. But that’s okay, since I heard that I turned out pretty great anyway.” He chuckles. “How about you? What’s your life story?”

 

 

The life of Do Kyungsoo wasn’t as interesting as Jongin’s— life was actually pretty… dull for him, until the day he met Jongin.

Kyungsoo was the type of kid to just obey his parents’ wishes, although they never suppressed him. They wanted him out of the house more than him staying in, and he didn’t have a lot of friends. He had a loyal friend though, Lim Hyunsik, but when he found his soulmate, Kyungsoo didn’t want to seem like a nuisance or a burden. He didn’t completely walk out of Hyunsik’s life, but he gave them the space he thought they wanted. He knew Ilhoon, Hyunsik’s soulmate, was fine with him hanging out with them, but it was Kyungsoo who didn’t seem to want it anymore.

 

Kyungsoo found out he was gay when he was in freshman high.

Sure, girls didn’t even bother to spare him a glance in middle school, and he didn’t mind any of them too, but all of a sudden, puberty happened. He didn’t know what got into the minds of people when he reached school because suddenly, girls were all over him and he didn’t want any of it. He didn’t even fix himself up that day, and he thought if you compared his face to the soccer team’s captain’s face, he’d look underdeveloped. But that was the day that he found out he was gay, because all of a sudden, girls were terrifying. The thought of even being with one freaked him out so bad, he avoided girls for the rest of the year, save for the projects and group works he had with some of them.

 

His parents were fine with it when he came out, because they thought that it was a good thing their son was out there in the open discovering himself instead of staying cooped up in his room by himself. Of course, Kyungsoo thought that this was sad because _what if I meet my soulmate and they turn out to be a girl? I know I want to see colors but I don’t think I want to see them_ that _bad._ was all he could think about. But during sophomore year, when their school accepted more girls than boys, Kyungsoo knew he had to adjust and just _try_ talking to them. Maybe even befriend some of them.

 

That’s how he found out that the reason girls were all over him was because of his stunning lack of change since middle school. Some looked at him thinking that he never grows old because puberty was good to him, not making any drastic changes in his appearance. This ‘natural charm’ of his attracted a lot of attention, so he made sure it was clear that he didn’t want to be in a relationship or anything with anyone. If people knew, he would call him a romantic, but Kyungsoo just really wanted to wait for his The One.

 

High school was pretty normal for Kyungsoo, though he didn’t attend dances because he didn’t want to bring anyone as a date and he most definitely didn’t want to go solo. He did, however, get average grades in all his subjects and got accepted to an arts school. Singing, as a matter of fact, was his favorite pastime. As it turned out, he was pretty good at it, so he decided to try his luck and auditioned using his favorite song. The judges loved his voice and he got accepted almost immediately.

 

Fate wasn’t sealed for Kyungsoo, though; he didn’t really want to be an idol. He thought that idols have difficult lives because they have to sacrifice their privacy for their job. The entertainment industry could be a rough place to be in and Kyungsoo wanted none of that. He continued to study his major, though, because he knew a degree would do him good. Although it wasn’t a medical degree like the one his parents wanted him to have, he felt the need to continue with his studies.

 

Maybe it was because of divine intervention or fate because if he turned his back on music, he wouldn’t have met him.

 

He wouldn’t have met The One.

 

 

 

It was inevitable, their meeting. They were in the same performing arts building, a vocal major and a dance major, just existing on opposite sides of the establishment. They had a totally different set of friends and had totally different personalities. Up until their final year of college, both of them managed to avoid each other unintentionally. But fate brought them together and everything changed.

 

 

 

 

“Do you know what you’re gonna do after graduating?”

 

“Nope. No clue. How about you, Xing?”

 

“I’m thinking of setting up a daycare center.”

 

Kyungsoo chokes on his spit. “You what?”

 

Yixing glares at him. “Yeah, I do. I think I want to own a daycare center. I mean, I love kids anyway and they seem to be okay with me, plus, I was born to be an entertainer. I’d be having fun and earning money at the same time!”

 

“You’re kidding, right?” Kyungsoo deadpans. “You flew here from China to get quality education to hone your singing and dancing talents and you want to open a _daycare center_?”

 

“No regrets,” Yixing puffs. “Better than not knowing what I want in life.” Yixing sticks his tongue out at Kyungsoo and takes a look at his watch. “Ohmygod I’m late for my dance class. I’m starting to like it so I’m sorry I can’t finish lunch with you but—“ he says as he takes off.

 

Kyungsoo laughs as he hears an “I’ll make it up to you!” from Yixing running down the hall. He starts to get up to throw his and Yixing’s lunches away – he didn’t really have an appetite that day – when he notices something on the table. Yixing left his phone.

 

“Aw man, I don’t even know where his classroom is,” Kyungsoo sighs. “He made his schedule his lockscreen wallpaper but he didn’t even put rooms on the thing. How he makes it to all of his classes on time, I will never know.” He starts walking away from the cafeteria in the direction of the dance department.

 

 

Kyungsoo didn’t mean to wander the halls before looking for Yixing. It was just that their hall was so unfamiliar to him, so he took his time absorbing everything he saw. He wondered what colors the walls were because they were white for him. A teacher from Kyungsoo’s class pointed out that the walls of their hallway were painted beige and that they blended beautifully with the brown of the ceilings, but Kyungsoo had yet to know if it was true for the dance department’s wing, too.

 

He hears music from the room on his left, and there he spots Yixing, standing in the front row of his class when—

 

 

“Ow!”

 

Kyungsoo bumped into some kind of wall and fell on his butt.

 

“Ohmygod I am so sorry I really didn’t see you there. Here, let me help you up.”

 

A hand was stretched out to him. He took it and stood up, started dusting himself without looking at the stranger with the deep voice. “What were you doing anyway? The hallway’s wide enough for the two of u—“

 

He looks up and when he locks eyes with the stranger, it was as if the whole world stopped and he was being born again, only this time, the world was alive. Suddenly, the hallway wasn’t wide enough and the music coming from the room next to them faded away in the background. The only noise Kyungsoo could make out was his heartbeat quickening its pace, his uneven breathing, and the rush of blood in his ears, making him feel a bit dizzy.

 

But at that moment, nothing else mattered, and everything was perfect.

 

 

 

 

Although it was already late for the both of them, breakfast was still a must. Kyungsoo stands up and walks to the kitchen, mind set on preparing a simple yet satisfying breakfast for Jongin. Knowing he had to do it fast because Jongin was due to come out of the shower in a few, he settles for making pancakes instead of something heavy. Pancakes were usually their Sunday’s wanted-to-sleep-for-5-more-minutes-but-woke-up-2-hours-later meal, but Jongin needed to eat and he needed to eat quickly.

 

While mixing the batter, Kyungsoo hears the bathroom door open, wet footsteps padding across their bedroom floor, and the bathroom door closing once again. Confused, he peeks inside their bedroom and finds out Jongin did, in fact, go back inside the bathroom.

 

“Yah! Kim Jongin, what in the world are you doing in there? You’re gonna be late!”

 

“Yeah yeah, I’ll be out in a sec.”

 

Kyungsoo returns to the kitchen, satisfied with his husband’s answer. _Maybe he cut himself while shaving again_ , he thinks and chuckles to himself. Jongin couldn’t have been styling his hair because teaching made him sweat a lot, deeming his careful grooming useless.

 

As he starts pouring the batter on the pre-heated pan, he jumps in surprise as he feels a pair of strong arms snaking around his waist. He looks at the now oval shape of the previously perfectly circular pancake. He turns around and frowns at Jongin. “You scared me! And in the middle of pouring the batter. Look, you ruined it.”

 

Seeing his husband frowning always makes Jongin want to pinch Kyungsoo’s nose, which he does. He chuckles as he watches Kyungsoo try to swat his hand away. “You can have that one then.”

 

When Jongin finally lets go, Kyungsoo takes a proper look at him. “You dress up fast.” He gives him a once-over and says, “And nice. What’s the occasion?”

 

“Don’t you remember? Today’s supposed to be the last day of the kids’ class.” Jongin scratches the back of his head. “I actually thought it was last week, that’s why I didn’t set the alarm last night, but then I saw the calendar and, well…”

 

Kyungsoo sighs but still smiles at him. “So I take it you won’t be eating breakfast anymore?”

 

Jongin walks over to the table and grabs an apple from the fruit bowl as an answer. Feeling slightly dejected, Kyungsoo turns to the stove, checking if the pancake was ready to be flipped. Sensing his husband’s sadness, Jongin strides over to Kyungsoo. “I’m sorry, baby. I’ll make it up to you, okay? I’ll be the one to cook the pancakes tomorrow.” He grins widely at Kyungsoo.

 

“Nope, I’ll still be the one cooking tomorrow,” he side-eyes Jongin. “Try harder.”

 

Jongin pouts and burrows his eyebrows in concentration. “Hmm. Movie night tonight? Complete with popcorn, pillows, blankets, and cuddling? Your movie choice?”

 

Kyungsoo faces Jongin, still eyeing him warily. Then his face breaks out into one of the blinding smiles that Jongin loves so much and nods his head. “I knew that’d do the trick,” Jongin chuckles heartily. “What do you want to watch?”

 

“Drama. Any movie. You choose. I just think I’m in the mood for crying tonight,” Kyungsoo smirks when he hears Jongin groaning.

 

“But whyyy—“

 

Kyungsoo laughs which cuts Jongin’s whining. “Because I’d be crying in your arms anyway, feeling sorry for whoever we’re watching because they don’t have what we do.”

 

Jongin’s expression softens. He looks Kyungsoo straight in the eyes and says, “No one does.” He kisses him right then and there – just a quick (albeit lingering) peck – but Kyungsoo feels all the love behind it. Jongin proceeds to kiss both his cheeks, his nose, and then his forehead. Jongin pulls him close, and Kyungsoo rests his arms around his husband’s waist. _This is nice_ , they both think to themselves as they sigh in contentment.

 

Jongin pulls away first, knowing he’d be late if he didn’t leave soon. Kyungsoo feels the loss in his arms and can’t help but feel a teensy weensy bit of disappointment flutter across his chest but, nevertheless, he understands. Besides, they’d be having another _Saturnight Movie-night_ (as Jongin prefers to call it) tonight so all is well.

 

“I’ll see you later, okay, Soo?” Jongin calls out as he puts his shoes on.

 

“Don’t get run over by a truck or something, okay?”

 

Jongin chuckles. “I love you, too. Be right back!” he calls out, exiting the apartment.

 

 

 

Kyungsoo isn’t fond of noise – hardly anyone is, actually – but he isn’t used to it, either. Being with Jongin caused his whole world to turn upside-down, though; he was never confined in his lonely room anymore, surrounded by the kind of silence only he could break, although there was no one he could break it with. When Jongin came into his life, the only silences he went through were comfortable ones. They would walk down the street hand in hand and stay silent and they would both be fine with it. When they have nothing to say to each other at lunch, they bask in the comfort of each other’s presence without feeling the need to say a word to each other. 

 

 

 

 

 

“Come here and pick the colors for me, would you? I want the place to look more happy and colorful, even if you’re still gonna be the only one in the place to see it properly, besides the parents who will be dropping their children off.” Yixing calls to Kyungsoo from where the cloths for the curtains were supposed to be. After having introduced Jongin to Kyungsoo when they bumped into each other while Kyungsoo was delivering Yixing’s phone to him, Kyungsoo believed that Yixing was truly an angel. Therefore, he agreed to run the daycare center idea with him, and they have been at it for 5 years now. Business was good.

 

Kyungsoo groaned. “But why do we have to replace the ones we have now? They look okay already. The kids love it, too.”

 

Yixing shrugs. “I just want to. Besides, when I’m gone, you’re gonna be running the place by yourself. You won’t have time to do this anymore so think of this as an opportunity to shop for spares.”

 

“I really don’t know why you’re going back to China. Your whole life is here! Plus, business is doing great! Would you really want to leave all that behind?” Kyungsoo wishes Yixing didn’t notice how desperate he sounded.

 

“No, I have _a_ life here, and I have _a_ life there as well. I miss my family, Soo. They miss me too and I haven’t gone back in a really long time.”

 

Kyungsoo avoids Yixing eyes and Yixing laughs. “I won’t be gone forever. I’ll call you and visit every once in a while! Besides, if I ever find The One, you’ll be—“

 

“—the flower girl, the ring bearer, the best man, and the bridesmaid, my all-in-one wedding surprise,” Kyungsoo says along with Yixing. He’s got the statement memorized already because Yixing wouldn’t stop mentioning it.

 

After laughing at each other and finishing their shopping, they part ways happy with each other. When Yixing left, Kyungsoo and Jongin were both there to see him off, with Kyungsoo just a little bit teary-eyed. Yixing was the reason he and Jongin were together, and Kyungsoo just couldn’t thank him enough.

 

 

 

 

 

After eating breakfast in front of the TV, something he’s certain he’s never done before because it would be improper to eat a meal in front of the television, he makes his way to the bathroom to take a shower.

 

_  
Kyungsoo-yah, I love you. I know I say it all the time but I realized that life is short so I have to make every moment with you count. I want to think of new ways to let you know how much I love you every day, to keep the spark alive and our moments together even more special than they already are right now. The day you came into my life was the day I was reborn into a brighter, more colorful world. I literally saw stuff I have never seen before, and it’s all because of you. You’re my drive, my motivation, and my inspiration. You know what my favorite color is as of today, since the day I met you? Your eyes. The color of your eyes never fail to take my breath away as I wake up to them every single day. Now, I’m sorry for writing on the mirror. I already researched about it and I know how to take this off. I just wanted to surprise you, that’s all. You’re surprised, right?_

_Never forget that I love you._  
_Yours forever and always,_  
_Jongin_  


 

Kyungsoo stares at the message written in Jongin’s almost illegible handwriting on the body mirror they had in the bathroom. _So this is why Jongin went back in this morning_ , he thinks to himself. His heart swells with adoration and pride in knowing he was the luckiest guy on earth, and goes back to his routine, grin never leaving his face.

 

 

When he finishes, a sense of forgetfulness fills him up. He doesn’t know what he was forgetting, so he started to worry and started pacing around the house. His heart beat speeds up and he can’t bring himself to calm down.

 

 

 

5 minutes later, there’s an unsettling feeling in the pit of his stomach, but he can’t explain why it’s there. Dread washes over him for absolutely no reason at all, making him feel like crying. He said that earlier, right? But it wouldn’t feel okay because Jongin wasn’t there yet. It wasn’t even nighttime yet! He tries to keep his head straight, chanting in his mind that _everything’s alright, this is nothing, why would you even feel this way right now?, you’re making your own drama again_ , and anything else he could come up with to keep himself calm. Yet, for the next half hour, Kyungsoo cries. He cries so hard it’s painful because there are no strong arms holding him while the sobs continuously rack his chest. His heart hurts and he closes his eyes because he can’t take the pain anymore, and when he opens them again, he knows.

 

 

 

He knows why the phone starts ringing off the hook. He knows why he can’t bring himself to drag his feet across the floor to answer, because he already knows what impending doom was awaiting to be reported to him. The dread worsens and buries itself deeper into the pit of Kyungsoo’s heart. He drowns in his tears and he starts to forget.

 

 

 

He forgets the chocolate brown of the pair of eyes he wanted to stare into forever; the pink tinting flustered cheeks; the blue of the sky above them; the green of everything surrounding them; the orange of their favorite couple sweater; the yellow of the toothbrush next to his violet one; the red he once attempted to color his hair with but ended up agreeing that they would both go red next time; the silver of his proposal ring; and the gold of their marriage band as the whole world fades to black and white once more.

 

 

 

 

 

Kyungsoo never sees the colors again.

**Author's Note:**

> chose not to warn anyone because i think if you knew jongin was gonna die, you wouldn't read this anymore lmao   
>  anyway thank you for reading!! spare me, for this was un-beta-d   
>  if you want me to do any other pairing for this soulmate!au prompt, just let me know.


End file.
